Dating women on the 1st date
“Thank her for the date, and wish her well in her search for Mr.Right.” Will you feel like you’re shooting a puppy?“Sometimes we are our own worst enemies in that when our hopes and fantasies clash with reality, we tend to over-focus on the fantasy and make excuses for or rationalize the reality,” she explains. I’d advise the same degree of self-awareness that I’d suggest to women in order to avoid the mess that can ensue as a result.” If your Spidey Sense tells you something’s amiss—say she’s 10 years older than she led you to believe, swapped out her pic for someone else’s on her profile, or invites you to her sister’s wedding for your next date—there’s nothing wrong with cutting your losses, as long as you do it [pagebreak] According to Davidson, the end of a meet-up date can be awkward, especially if you aren’t sure if you want to see her again.“One way to handle it is to say something like, ‘I’ve really enjoyed spending time with you.Joy Davidson, the stakes are generally higher for her.“Remember that getting ready for a first ‘meet-up’ takes as much time and effort for a woman as a real first date,” Davidson explains.Granted, if you two don’t click, they might just be karma points, but if there’s chemistry, you’ll have avoided turning her off by lacking finesse.” NEXT: Don't Take Her Skepticism Personally [pagebreak] Most online dating advice regarding safety is geared toward women, and not without good reason.
It's always your best bet to take your Internet conversation into the real world as soon as possible before you establish a virtual rapport that can become awkward and stilted when it has to translate into face-to-face.
“If someone starts talking about the future at the first meeting, or even if she jumps into bed with [you] the same night (unless it was a sex match-up site), be on the lookout for a clingy, dependent type,” Davidson warns. Some information will be designed to ensure her own safety; other information is just inappropriate—like discussing or asking about intimate details of past relationships early on.
Usually, if something feels ‘weird’ or ‘off,’ it probably is, so trust your instincts.” Finally, Davidson notes, guys should avoid getting so wrapped up in their own fantasies about someone that they miss the cues that would otherwise tell them she’s not right for them.
Why don’t we both think about how we feel about another date.
I’ll email (or text, or IM) you later.’ Then be sure you do it,” she says.
Find a way to explain, as nicely as you can, that you’re not feeling the need to go forward, then say goodbye.